Want More Anxious and Poorly Adjusted Kids? Beat Them- A Study on Corporal Punishment
Now I know I will immediately get hate mail from those who spank their kids and quote the bible, “spare the rod and spoil the child”, as well as the many that were beaten and say, “I turned out fine”. To all those who fit that description, all I can say is I am sorry for you and for your children. If what you are doing is not working out so well, might you be open to learning a different way of doing things? I have heard that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
The study “Corporal Punishment, Maternal Warmth, and Child Adjustment: A Longitudinal Study in Eight Countries,” discussed how previous research has found that corporal punishment generally is related to worse child adjustment (anxiety and aggression) and is generally moderated by maternal warmth. They found in this study across 8 countries (China, Colombia, Jordan, Kenya, the Philippines, Thailand, and the United States) that the above was true and that in some cases, if moms were both providing the warmth and the corporal punishment there was even more anxiety created. You can read the study here…
Discipline means ‘to teach,’ not ‘punishment’. I learned from raising my own children that taking things away from a teenager didn’t work for some. Getting a teenager to participate in activities that benefit others has a very positive effect. Putting younger children in time-out may work but the real magic in parenting comes from positive random love, kindness, and just noticing your child. I recommend the book “The Conscious Parent”, which is full of great examples of how to create a child who is filled with self esteem and will be less likely to have anxiety, anger, or behavior issues.